The dentist

My beloved dentist retired, which is too bad. I went to meet the new dentist.

The new dentist said he was more of a coach than a dentist. He said,

I’ve never seen a tooth without a person attached.

Then he asked me if I drink much seltzer or sparkling water (not really) and he told me there’s citric acid in the canned green tea his wife buys, and that three days a week he drives up from Orange County listening to podcasts about the dark web and marketing.

I told him my previous dentist always gave me nitrous, part of her “relax the patient” philosophy. The new dentist said they didn’t have nitrous in his office, so I said I’m in the wrong office and he didn’t laugh.

Then he declared me healthy and I got X-rayed. That was the last I heard from him and my teeth are working fine, so I guess I’ll just go back to get them cleaned again in a couple months.